What Does God Want Me To Believe About Myself? (Part One)

 

“I just can’t do it!” I hear my client say.  I am coaching a young adult and they’ve mentioned that they struggle to consistently mark and keep track of their daily goals each night. The approach that we are taking on his improvement includes 6 goals that need to be worked on everyday.  In order to channel our efforts towards the clients needs, it’s important to know which goals he did well with, and which ones he struggled with. Keeping track of the goals has been hard for this client, but luckily, he’s not alone and I’ve seen over one hundred of my clients find solutions to this issue. 

I offer some ideas of things that have worked in the past. He responds, “I haven’t tried those before, but I already tried several other things and they just don’t work for me. I just can’t do it!” 

I want him to keep trying because I’m certain that we can find a solution, but unfortunately, even if he tried new things, with his current beliefs, it probably wouldn’t make a difference.

Satan is really good at discouraging our efforts by attacking our identity. He has practice working with the human mind. He discovered that he can limit us with our beliefs. So many people say - and believe - the words “I’m an addict,” "I'm just a lazy person,” or “I’m not a book-reader.” The thought process that follows is “why would I even try?” Why would someone work hard on an addiction if they will always fall back into it?

At times this is used more as an excuse or justification to continue an unwanted or unhealthy behavior. Satan also uses this like shackles to keep us trapped on the same path (I’ve seen this most with addictions). When combined with shame it’s extremely hard to break free from those beliefs. Satan wants us to keep things a secret. “If she finds out about this then…” The longer something stays a secret, the more shame that is felt. Then, while working to overcome the unwanted behavior or addiction, it’s easier to give in. Again, “why even try if this is already who I am?” Anytime there is a relapse, even if there was improvement, you hear: “I told you. This is who you are. Why are you fighting this?” 

Oftentimes, we come to believe that our biggest identity is that we’re “broken.” 

I saw this very personally in the life of my wife, Nathaly. Growing up, people close to her were relentless in expressing their opinion that she was fat. Cruel nicknames followed, and eventually she believed what they were telling her… including that she was ugly. With that false identity, she felt “broken.”  Why even try to eat better, exercise, or meet new guys, if she believed that it wouldn't amount to anything?

Clearly this mindset can be detrimental to our growth and mental health. Changing to a better mindset is a process that is easiest with God. How do we do it?

In part two I will explain some ways that God helps us in this specific attack of Satan.